Simply in the Suburbs

Intentional Living in the Land of Distractions

Watching Football and Whole30

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…and other weekend rituals (Round 6, Day 4)

Day 4 was the first time I had to watch a football game during this round of Whole30.

Nobody put a gun to my head, but I’m a football fan. There were NFL playoff games on. I watch. It’s what I do.

The ritual normally includes opening a beer, grabbing a bag of snacks, and relaxing on a couch, watching the game.

But not on this day. I opened a La Croix, grabbed a handful of sunflower seeds, and relaxed on the couch.

It wasn’t exactly the same, but it wasn’t so bad.

The theme for this round for me is starting to become, “You’re a grownup human. You have the power over your own choices.”

A more irreverent version: You’re a grown-ass man. Do what you know you gotta do!

I don’t have to drink beer when I watch a football game. I don’t have to eat snacks randomly throughout the day because there are snacks in the pantry to be eaten.

I forget this. I love snacks but eating them without regard on a consistent basis is the kind of consistency that will put you in an early grave, or at least into size 46 waist trousers. You notice they’re called trousers when they get big? I’d rather stay in sizes where you still call them pants.

The upshot: I don’t have to do the things I always do because I always do them. When I know better about what’s best for me and have some momentum to do those things, I need to do those things.

Whether there’s football on the TV or not.

Eggs, Tuna, and Greens – Whole30 Round 6 Day 2

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Whole30 Day 2 . In the books.

As I ate my meals, I realized that one of the biggest complaints about the Whole30 is that it restricts the variety of food you can eat.

It’s true that I end up eating ‘Eggs in the Grass’ every morning (three eggs cooked over medium into a bed of sauteed spinach). But think about what you normally eat in the morning.

Do you mix it up or is it basically the same thing?

Or for lunch. Do you have the same sandwich every day or do you go on a foodie exploration every day?

It’s not that hard to come up with 3 or 4 simple go-to meals on this Whole30 meal plan.

The main kicker is that you’ll more than likely have to actually prepare it. There aren’t too many frozen meal options (WalMart has some actually) or fast food option (although Chipotle now has a Whole30 Burrito Bowl).

So no matter what different eating plan you’re tempted to take on, don’t fret about limited variety. More than likely, you’re not that adventurous as it is. The only thing that kind of gets stymied is the ability to willy-nilly grab junk food out of the pantry. Something I really love to do!

On to day 3….

Whole30 Day 1 – Round 6

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  • Meal 1
  • Meal 2
  • Meal 3

I’m going to try to do something very 2015 and blog through a 30 day challenge.

My plan: Recap each day of my Whole30 efforts this January, 2018.

This is my 6th time doing a Whole30. Probably my 9th time starting one. It gets easier. It gets harder. I actually started a day after everybody else who does a January Whole30 because I have a hard time wasting good leftovers.

I had to finish some food we had left from New Year’s Eve and Christmas before I started this little eating plan on January 2.

Day 1 is always easy. I’m not bored of the food. Most people can handle one day of not eating any processed foods.

So I can build this writing habit, I’m keeping this entry short..

How To See What You Can’t See

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Photo by Josh Calabrese on Unsplash

Recently, I watched the first episode of the Cleveland Browns season of the HBO series, Hard Knocks.

There was a scene in the show where Jarvis Landry, who was beginning his first season as a Brown, confronts his teammates about their poor habits on the practice field. And by ‘confronts’, I mean verbally berate them.

His comments were probably warranted. He went to college at a winning program (LSU) and averaged around 1,000 yards receiving in his two years as a Miami Dolpin.

Basically, the guy has a winner’s perspective.

The Cleveland Browns? 0-16 the year before. 1-15 the year before that. 3-13 the year before that.

I don’t want to assume that the team’s culture is suspect, but there’s a chance that’s the case.

Enter Landry.

A new set of eyes.

Someone who can see the situation with more perspective than those who have been living in the situation for a couple years.

People with bad habits don’t always realize there’s another way. They don’t even see the habits as bad habits. The habits are just the way life is done.

Bad practice isn’t bad practice. It’s just practice.

That is, until someone who knows how to practice and who has a work ethic and who has experienced success comes in and gives a vision for a new direction.

Even new Browns quarterback Tyrod Taylor – the Browns new quarterback – despite being on a mediocre team in the Buffalo Bills, brings a ‘first to the office’ work ethic that shines the light on a mentality of just showing up and grabbing a paycheck.

The point of all this: Sometimes we can’t see what we need to see because we’re too entrenched on the inside.

We don’t see where we’re lacking. We don’t see our bad habits. We aren’t clear where our thinking is wonky.

We need someone from the outside. A trusted friend. A counselor. A coach.

And we need ears to hear. We need to be open. We can’t be defensive, especially if there’s an area where we know for sure we aren’t getting the results that we want.

We all need someone, every once in a while, to walk through and evaluate our ‘practice habits’. We need to let someone in, and if we don’t have someone that jumps to mind, then we need to be willing to pay a professional and give them access so they can see what we can’t see.

Why?

We don’t want to be the 2015-2017 Cleveland Browns in any area of our lives. We don’t want to go 1-15 in parenting. We don’t want to be 3-13 as a spouse. We don’t want our physical health’s record to be the equivalent of 0-16.

Find someone to see what you can’t see and be willing to hear what he or she has to say.

Being Clear On What You Want

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My daughter recently auditioned for a part in a local youth musical theater production. These productions bring out a lot of talented kids and the casts are large. Most students end up in the ensemble. Key roles and small solos are few and far between.

She was delighted to score a small solo for this particular show. Like I said, with nearly 70 kids in a cast, there aren’t that many solo parts to go around. Competition can be fierce.

As it turns out, the solo she was slated for is actually written to be a three part harmony. When time came to rehearse that part of the song, the music director asked her if she was fine with dropping her solo.

Wanting to be a team player, she said, ‘Sure.’

I discovered when I picked her up from rehearsal that she really wasn’t so sure. As a matter of fact, she was severely disappointed.

I’m the king of seeing things from the other side. This small solo is such a small part of the show, that I’m sure the director assumed it was no big deal. She’d ask my daughter – an 11 year old middle-schooler. And she would assume my daughter would have the strength and courage to be fully honest. They’d move on. No fuss no muss.

Still, this seemingly small part to the production team was the largest part of the show for my daughter. It was an opportunity to grow and experience a rare moment on stage.

One of the principles of living more simply is being clear on what you want and being willing to stand for it.

I coached my daughter that no matter who is asking your opinion or if you’re ‘okay’ with this or that, be as honest as you possibly can. Whether that person is a teacher, boss, friend, or even myself or her momma.

Be clear on what you want. State it loudly and clearly. If you’re ultimately overruled, that’s fine, but give yourself every opportunity by being honest about your wishes.

Most of us grow up with a tendency to take the temperature of the room and go along with what we think others want. We grow up trying to be ‘nice’.

While we ultimately have to accept decisions if we don’t have the final say – and have to do so with grace and a positive attitude, we should train ourselves to be clear on what we might want or what we think is best.

Being clear on what we want is an exercise in honesty. It will encourage quality communication over time. Even if what we want is selfish or not for the good of the whole, being clear is the first step to admitting the want is selfish or might not be the best.

This is not about defiantly demanding your own way. It’s about establishing a habit of being clear so you can deal frankly with others. Sometimes, your clarity will clearly show you some issues in your own heart that need to be dealt with: areas of selfishness, resentment, unforgiveness, and so forth.

Normally, though, being clear on what you want sets the stage for more opportunities and better communication.

If my daughter can develop this habit of clarity at an early age vs. always figuring out what folks want and succumbing to their wishes, things will go much better for her over time.

All of us would do well to develop this habit. I’m pretty clear on that.

Letting the Good In and the Bad Out

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Photo by Sam Rupsa on Unsplash

I’m in the middle of a short reading plan in YouVersion.  The plan is based on the classic Christian living book Boundaries.

The big idea: We all have a particular plot of emotional, mental, physical land that we have been given control of.

From there, we create boundaries that help keep the bad out and the good in.

The boundaries have to be permeable so that more good can make its way in. They also have to be permeable enough to let the bad out.

Unfortunately, many of us have reversed the flow of good and bad. We’re nervous to let good in. We’re scared to let the bad out.

Do you recognize these types of statements:

  • I’m just not able to do that.
  • I’m just that way.
  • I can’t change. It’s just who I am.
  • They don’t care what I have to say.
  • Nobody thinks my ideas matter.
  • I’ve been too bad for too long.

Generally, these statements prevent you ushering the bad out – the sin, resentment, the fear, feelings of uselessness.

They also hinder the good from coming in – allowing others to speak life into you, allowing ourselves to share with someone who genuinely cares and who can identify the contributions you can make, allowing others to help bear burdens.

Boundaries allow us to visualize where we need to protect ourselves – both from forces on the outside and from forces on the inside.

They also allow us to consider clearly what we allow in.

Most importantly, the idea helps us see our ownership and power to make these decisions.

What or who do you need to let in?

What do you need to usher out via forgiveness, confession, or replacing old thoughts with new?

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